Personal Update

These past two weeks have been very hectic and stressful, which is why I haven't been active on my blog lately. A lot has been going on and I don't really know where to start!

Last week was particularly stressful, and by thursday I was at that point of overwhelment (did I just make up a new word? haha ^^) and my mind and body just couldn't take it any longer, and well it kind of exploded. By thursday the stress had all caught up to me and I had extremely built up anxiety, which caused me to be physically sick :( The following day my mind and body literally did 'shut down' and I fainted in one of my seminars! It was so embarrassing, and such a horrible experience. I've fainted before, but this time was different because I was with a group of people I didn't know particularly well and in a situation (speech class) which made me all the more stressed than I already was. It all happened very suddenly... we were all sitting around a big table, having just listened to somebody give their presentation, and all of a sudden I got very very hot, and started sweating like crazy (which is very rare because I hardly ever get hot). Then my eyes started blacking out, and everything was flashing black and white. I put my elbows onto the table and rested my head in my hands, trying to calm myself down and not cause a scene in class. But then I felt my whole body shaking profusely. Luckily I had told my friend Sarah (who was sitting behind me) before class that I was really stressed and that I had been sick the night before. She realised what was happening and helped me leave the room. I don't remember clearly what happened next, but Sarah told me I walked to the door fine, but then when i got to the door I just went straight into it (I don't remember that happening, so I must have fainted at that moment in time), I vaguely remember a few of my classmates picking me up to help me out into the corridor. They got me to sit down and my vision started coming back, but in flashes again. I could hear them talking to me again, but it sounded like they were shouting. Luckily admin came to my rescue and somebody who had been through all the training to deal with situations like that. They were all so lovely, somebody made me a cup of tea with sugar in their own mug, one of my lecturers came and spoke to me for a while to make sure I was alright, and Sarah stayed with me which helped me feel less embarrassed.

Wow I sound like such a drama queen haha ^^ But it really wasn't a very nice experience, and I really don't want that to happen again! My friends took really good care of me over the weekend, and I'm so grateful to them for that, I really am so lucky to have such amazing friends! Emma and Lucy came with me to the doctors because I was feeling anxious and was worried I could have a freak-o moment if I was left alone. The doctor recommended I do a blood test, and so I went on tuesday morning to have it done. It was my first ever blood test! Beth came with me and kept me company, which I am so grateful to her for. She woke up extra early just to come with me so that I would be less nervous, such a cutie pie ^^ I got my results yesterday, and the doctor has asked to see me again next week. I'm kind of worried about it, but I guess I won't know what's up until next thursday so i'm trying my best to keep calm about it, as it may not be anything to worry about (fingers crossed!).

I went to a mindfulness session last week, which I had been wanting to do for ages, and therefore was so glad to finally start learning how to practice it. Mindfulness is a buddhist practise which involves meditation. It does NOT involve thinking about 'nothing', and is actually the complete opposite! The aim of Mindfulness is to train your mind to focus your attention on what you want it to focus on, to pay attention to the present moment, to 'watch' your thoughts and feelings un-judgementally rather than being consumed by them. It is a learnt skill that requires patience and it does take a long time to get to grips with. However, it truly is a worthwhile skill to learn, and i'm very excited to attend more sessions, learn more about the practise and in turn get better at practising it and applying it to every day life. It is also a form of therapy that I am highly interested in training for, so that I can apply it throughout my career as a clinical psychologist! I will most certainly be creating an entire post about mindfulness in the near future, once i've attended a few more sessions and practised it more regularly in my day to day living. Look out for it if you're interested in learning more about it!

The main aim of this week for me was to manage my stress and to look after myself. I realised that I've been running on extremely high levels of stress since coming back to Bangor in September, and I was just too busy to look after myself properly. I realised that I was running low on inspiration and that that was probably a strong factor causing my negative moods. Last year I finally found a person who truly inspired me; Miranda Kerr! Her positive approach to life truly is incredible, and she is such a strong, independent, genuine woman, who seriously has become my number one role model. She carries herself with such confidence and she encourages the public and all of her fans to look after themselves, both physically and mentally. If you haven't read her book 'Treasure Yourself'...you must! She's just such an inspiration, and I just love her incredibly :') Whenever I have low-self esteem, whenever I feel anxious or whenever I realise I need an energy lift, I always watch her interviews or read sections of her book, and they never fail to make me feel better about things. I realised this week that a reason i've probably kind of fallen apart this past month is because I haven't taken the time to be inspired. I didn't keep reminding myself of the things that Miranda's messages had taught me (to care for myself, and to believe in myself) and as a result I lacked positive internal vibes. This week I have been 'catching up' on Miranda inspiration, and I'm already feeling so much better for it!
This is my favourite interview with Miranda, and I've shared it with so many of my friends, purely because I believe she's such a good role model and every girl should have somebody to look up to... So i'll share the video with you guys here ^^

This week I also went to yoga with Lucy. Which was really great! I love yoga, and one of my favourite memories has to be a time in Bintan when I did yoga on the beach during sunset... heavenly! ^^ This weeks session was for an hour and a half, and although it wasn't on a beach, with the sounds of water and waves, but instead in a studio room, with the sounds of people playing squash on the courts next door, it was still a really relaxing hour and a half ^^ I was in much need of de-stressing!

Monday night Lucy, Emma, Beth and I went to Varsity for half price dinner ^^ It was a really nice meal with my girls, and it helped take my mind of stuff and just relax for a while. These three girls have been so great in being there for me lately and I love them all the more for it. Thank you beauts! <3

Lucy and I.

Lucy and Emma.

Beth and I.

ALSO, my parents booked my flight tickets home today... for NEXT WEEKEND! :O It was a totally spontaneous decision to go home next weekend for my study week, because I wasn't planning on going back home to Spain until my holiday in December. But my mum text me during my lecture yesterday, when I was feeling very stressed, after having just found out my blood test results and being told that the doctor wanted to see me again, so when my mum asked me if I had decided to come home for my study week, I just was like 'YES I WANT TO'. I need a mummy cuddle, and cuddles from my puppies! I need my mum's home cooked meals and I need to just GET AWAY FROM ALL THE STRESS THAT'S BEEN FOLLOWING ME AROUND HERE IN BANGOR. I'm so relieved and excited to know that i'm going home so soon. I really do NEED to go home, over wise i'm going to just explode!

I just got home from an interview to participate in a volunteer group at a local mental health unit. And I really really really want to be chosen. I'm not sure how well my interview went, I think I came across as confident, but i'm worried I sounded a bit too keen... if that's possible? haha ^^ We'll see, i'll let you know once I hear back from them whether I got chosen or not. Eekkk!

I also got my two speeches out of the way today in my speech class! Thank goodness! That was also a huge relief :') And guess what... I didn't faint! Success! haha ^^

Sorry this post was very poorly structured, and severely unorganized, i've been having a pretty hectic time lately...as you can probably tell! Hopefully my next post isn't so frantic. I've got fitness training in 45 minutes for netball, so I can blow off some steam there ^^ Hope you're all well and haven't been as stressed as I have!

-Alyssa xo

End Stigma

This week was Mental Illness Awareness Week. Mental health is most certainly a topic that is very dear and incredibly important to me. As someone who is aspiring to become a clinical psychologist, I feel it be a responsibility of mine to help spread awareness, in the attempt to reduce the great deal of stigma that has, unfortunately, been attached to mental illness. And, as a blogger, what better way than to spread awareness through my very own blog!? In this post I will try my best to inform you of some of the many issues caused by mental health discrimination, and in turn will share some suggestions as to how you, as an individual, can help reduce these very issues. I attended a talk on World Mental Health Day (10^th October), and it is the messages I received there, and from the brochure (put together by Time to Change Wales) I took home, that I will be including and sharing with you in this post. To find out more information you can visit Time to Change Wales online. 

There are many myths and stereotypes surrounding mental illness, and many people affected by mental ill health are unjustly discriminated against. As a result of discrimination, many of those with mental health problems often;

•      feel isolated
•       lose self-confidence
•       feel embarrassed
•       avoid everyday activities (such as going shopping)
•       find it difficult to build new relationships and maintain existing ones
•       have difficulty openly disclosing mental health issues for fear of being judged

and the list goes on…

As you can see there is such an immense negative impact of stigma on those with mental health problems. And did you know that ¼ people suffer from mental health problems? It isn’t as rare as you may have believed…

Many people shy away from people with mental illness as they don’t quite know what to do, they don’t believe that there is anything they can do to help. However this is so very far from the truth! There is so much that you can do, even a few small words of support, love and respect can go a very long way in making someone with a mental illness feel less alone, less scared and more hopeful. Don’t be afraid to ask how they are if you know that they have been unwell, let them know that you care. Keep in touch, it’s as simple as sending a text message, giving them a quick call or even sending them a short letter, to remind them that you care. Be open-minded, non-judgemental, and be a listening ear, a lot of the time advice isn’t even required, just be there, and listen. Be sensitive, and don’t use stereotypical words, and don’t make quick, incorrect judgements. And remember that a person is not defined by their mental illness, although it may be one small part of them, it is not the whole.

It really is time to end mental health discrimination. There is still way too much unnesessary stigma attached to many mental illnesses and it’s important for those stigmas to be made aware and to be diminished. The realities of mental illnesses need to be brought to light and those suffering from them need to be understood and supported. Mental health issues are serious and therefore need to be taken seriously. They are extremely challenging to live with and everybody should make an effort (even if just a little) to make sure that those suffering do not feel alone and scared.

This week of all weeks has made me even the more excited to begin my career as a clinical psychologist, to do my part in the world to support those that suffer from mental illness and to be responsible for teaching others about the realities of mental health disorders.

Thank you all so much for reading this post. I know this was a very serious subject matter, and may have been difficult for some to read, however just because it is difficult does not mean we should ignore it. In fact it gives all the more reason to acknowledge the negative impact of stigma and in return reduce it. I encourage everybody to be loving, kind and respectful, and I wish good mental health to all <3

Talk about mental health. End Stigma.

-Alyssa xo

I Love Wednesday Nights

I promised I would write my next post a lot quicker than my last, and so here you go... ^^

I want my blog to serve as a sort of online journal, so that I can look back through it and remember all the wonderful times that I've had, whether it be here in Bangor experiencing university life, back home in Spain with my family, or any other travels I may have (such as my time in the U.S with Logan this summer!).

Wednesday night was a really fun night out with firstly the riding club (for dinner) and secondly my friends (for a night out on the dance floor).

Typical Alyssa... I took my camera with me to Varsity, which is the place where the riding club met to have a meal together, and when I go to take my camera out to take a photo of my food (have to get the usual 'look how good my food looks shot'... ^^), I look like an idiot because I forgot to put the battery back in -.- So a phone shot was the best I could do,  *sigh*...



I also never ended up taking any photos of my friends, so this documentation won't do my memory much good in the future... haha ^^ Anywhoooo, despite camera issues, I had a lovely meal with everyone. I love spending time with the riding club because they're such great company, and we have a common interest in horse riding and horses ^^

After the meal, I spent the night drinking too much and dancing hard with my house mates, plus Younes ^^ I had such a lovely night with them all, and actually managed to get some decent photos before we headed out... the ones taken at Peep (one of three night clubs we have to choose from here in little Bangorland) on the other hand were quite something... and most of them I can't even tell what they are of ^^ There were a handful that turned out relatively decent however, and although they are blurry, I love them so much! They really show just how much fun we were having and you can see how happy we all are boogying away :')

Beth, Younes, Brian & Sarah <3

Lucy and I <3 Just before this photo was taken I broke Lucy's wine glass... with my elbow... haha ^^
p.s notice the awkward sink... in our LIVING ROOM... like I don't even know...we always ask ourselves 'why....'

Rob, Alex and I <3 Aren't we just the most coolest looking people ever? hmmm...

Me, Beth, Lucy & Ben.

Lucy, Me & Beth <3

Sarah, Lucy, Me, Brian, some random guy we don't know... haha ^^& Ben.

Peace Out!
-Alyssa xo

Back in Bangorland!

Okay, so I'M STILL ALIVE! It's been so long since my last post... about three weeks! I've been so incredibly busy, and although I'd love to share with you everything i've been up to these past few weeks, it would literally take me an entire day to do so, so I'll just have to tell you about a few things ^^

As you could have probably guessed by the title of this post, I am indeed back in Bangor! For those of you who don't know where Bangor is, well it's a teeny tiny little city (one of the smallest in Britain!) in north west Wales, UK (and i'm talking pretty much as north as you can get!). Although it's small, I love this little city to pieces. It's a university city with a population of about 14000, roughly 10000 of which being students! It's pretty awesome because as my school isn't a typical 'campus' school, and is spread throughout the city, as the majority of the population are students, it makes the place seem like one big university world. It's like living in a bubble, which I love ^^ Although this year I haven't taken any photos of Bangor itself, I'll show you some old ones I'd taken so you can see what it looks like ^^

This photo was taken right by the main university building, which is on top of a hill. You can see down onto Bangor from up here :) As Bangor is on the coast, we're surrounded by the sea, and I'm so glad that we have water near by, because I'm too used to living by the sea (in Singapore I was a five minute walk from the sea, and in Spain my house is also a 1 minutes drive to the beach!). I think I'd feel trapped without having open water close by... I love open water just as much as I love lights, they make me happy when I'm feeling down, and always manage to open my mind when I'm stressing out about something (usually unnecessarily).

This is a photo of a small part of Bangor University's main building. I love this building so much, and I think it's rather beautiful, it's commonly known as the 'hogwarts building' here ^^ This is where I have most of my lectures, and so spend the majority of my school hours here.

 I know this photo isn't the best however it's the one of the more decent ones I have of Bangor's high street. Bangor's high street is supposedly the longest high street in Wales, however from the big cities i'm used to... it's so quaint and cute ^^

These next two photos were taken on Bangor pier. I love the pier, it's such a nice place to take a stroll and to sit and have a heart to heart with a friend. It's absolutely freezing in the winter months though, because the sea breeze attacks you left, right and centre!

This photo was taken on the beach at about this time last year! My friends and I went down to the beach for sunset to have a BBQ. It was such a lovely night and it is one of my favourite memories of my first year in Bangor and in University ^^

I love being in such a geographically awesome place! As well as the sea, we're also surrounded by mountains. These two photos were taken at the top of Snowdonia mountain range, in may. My friends, Logan and I all hiked up there together for the day and it, again, has become one of my most fond memories of last year <3

 It's so so great being back in Bangor, and back with my friends ^^ It's weird, but nice, being in second year rather than first. I miss living in halls, but I'm really enjoying the new house and being able to live with so many of my friends...there's NINE of us! It's quite hectic in the kitchen and such, and it's been quite a challenge to keep it clean, but other than that it's super lovely being in a busy, bustling house ^^

I flew back to the UK with my parents on the 20th September, and drove to my aunts house in Sheffield to spend the weekend, and to collect all of my stuff which my aunt and uncle so kindly stored for me over the summer. My parents and I drove to Bangor on the sunday, and they helped me move all my stuff into the new house. I love my new room, it's so spacious and it's all nice and cosy with my fairy lights, pictures and posters.

My parents stayed until that thursday, which I was really happy about because my dad had never been to Bangor, and so I had the opportunity to show him where i've been for the past year and where I will be for the next two! Unfortunately I didn't take many photos that week but the few I did I'll include ^^

I took my parents to llandudno for a day out and we had a really nice time (despite the heavy fog). Due to the fog my photo's aren't the best of quality, and to top it off, they were taken with my phone rather than my camera ^^

I love this photo of my parents, they look so cute ^^ ahhh, I miss them! :'(

For those of you who know me well, you will know that I take photos of my food quite a bit too often. But cmon'... this nutella and banana crepe was just too beautiful NOT to take a photo of! ^^ My parents and I went to have crepes at the crepe cafe in upper Bangor, and I can't believe i've only been there twice in the whole year that i've been here. The pancakes are so yum, and the cafe is so small, cute and cosy. I'm hoping to turn this cafe into a regular place for my friends and I to eat, muahaha ^^

I've only actually been to a few parties in the last two weeks! However, each time I did actually go out I did get quiteeeeee drunk. I've become such a light weight over the summer. I hardly had any alcohol the entire four month holiday, so coming back to university partying took my body by surprise ^^  I got most drunk last wednesday night, on the horse riding club social (I'm part of the horse riding club, if you didn't already know ^^), and we did a sort of pub crawl... we went to specific pubs and had to have specific drinks in each place, and by have I mean not take your time and enjoy, but down your drink in two. In total I had about ten or eleven drinks, whoops ^^ The evidence is clear in the photos from that night. Some of the photos are so embarrassing, I most certainly will not share them on here haha ^^ I'll post a few photos from that night though, just because it was such an awesome night, with such great people!

I wish this photo of Lucy and I came out clearer, it would have been such a good photo of the two of us together! Although the quality of this photo isn't the best, I still wanted to include it in this post because Lucy Lou means a lot to me and I love her to bits. Lucy and I were flat mates last year, and are still living together this year. I'm so happy that we were put into the same flat last year because she has become someone whom I can confide in, which is extremely difficult for me to do. I just wanted to say thank you to her for giving me another person to trust and another person to open up to and to just be myself with <3



I love these two girls too! Emma (to the right) and Rachel (in the middle). Like Lucy, Emma and I were also flat mates last year, and are still living together this year. Emma was the first person I truly bonded with in Bangor, and if it weren't for her I would have felt quite alone. She was the first friend in bangor whom I confided in with everything, and I feel so blessed to have met her and so grateful to have her in my life.

I met Rach through the riding club, and she is honestly one of the most lovely and genuine people I know. Although we don't spend as much time together as I would like, whenever we hang out it's always so much fun and full of laughs ^^

Such a fine photo of the three of us.... haha ^^ Again, I just wanted to post this photo because of the wonderful people in it.. Emma and Lucy. I seriously love them both so much, and I personally think we make such an awesome little trio ^^

The riding club! I had such a good night last wednesday with the club and tomorrow we're all going for a quiet dinner together. I'm so excited about it! They all make such wonderful company :)



My little family <3 These guys (plus others who couldn't fit in the photo!) have seriously become my family away from home. They've made my time here so far in Bangor amazing, and i'm happy to be continuing the experience with them for another year. If these guys have anything to do with it... this year is going to be awesome!

Another highlight of the last two weeks was going out for a family dinner with the house. We went to Varsity and pigged out on huge meals and shared desserts ^^

Not only have I enjoyed my social life back in Bangor so far, but i've also really enjoyed being back in school and studying the subject that I just keep growing even more in love with; psychology! I can't explain how much i'm loving studying the subject i've been so passionate about since the age of twelve, but didn't have the chance to up until last year! We're studying three completely new modules this semester, and so far i'm enjoying them all; social psychology (which i'm absolutely loving), psychobiology, and cognition & perception. I'm such a nerd, just thinking about studying psychology makes me so incredibly happy! Meehee ^^

Well, it's now 1am and I should really be getting to sleep now. I will try my absolute best to ensure my next post will come sooner than this one did!

-Alyssa xo